Braving the Wilderness with Vulnerability

by Nov 15, 2020Blog, Courageous Leadership, Positive Intelligence

When I looked at all the 5 courageous Leadership principles I highlighted from my blog two weeks ago, I had planned on writing on the principle of “Believe You Can”. Then life took a short detour which had me thinking more about the principle of “Lean In” which is rooted in vulnerability. My bestie, Bren√© Brown, shares her definition of vulnerability;

Here’s what I believe to be true about honoring the principle of “Lean-In” towards a more vulnerable life led from a spirit of courageous leadership…

  • It’s willing to be risk judgment and saying what needs to be said
  • It’s inviting help from others when the going gets tough rather than doing it all yourself and struggling
  • It’s expressing emotions instead of bottling them up even if it makes others uncomfortable
  • It’s letting others see your mess when you don’t have it all together so they can see you are human
  • It’s allowing someone to do something for you and accepting it without feeling guilt or shame

I noticed several examples last week where I chose to honor the principle of “lean in”. It’s not easy to do when some of my top saboteurs are Hyper-Achiever [looking perfect & Doing It all – no time for emotions], Avoider [Don’t rock the boat], and Hyper-Rational [explain away the emotions].

These saboteurs like to tell me that this isn’t the time or it’s not rational to break down in tears and ask for help. They like to tell me to “Keep it all together at all costs”. That’s a heavy shield to hold up and they like to tell us nasty lies. I’m done holding on to this old belief.

Have you ever had some of those thoughts?

Here’s what I know happens when vulnerability is chosen over the shields of protection and control. It reduces stress and worry which are breeding grounds for procrastination, depression, and anxiety to take root.

  • When you share with someone you trust your struggles, they can support you.
  • When you give yourself permission to release the emotions, they can’t stay bottled up and linger inside.
  • When you express your needs and wants, they have a better chance of being met.
  • When you speak up, others can hear and be inspired.

Where are you on your journey of trusting yourself and others so you can Lean In with vulnerability?

  • How often do you find yourself keeping it all together at the expense of your feelings?
  • How often are you doing everything for everyone else instead of processing your own emotions?
  • How often are you taking care of others when you actually need help yourself?
  • You don’t need to do it all yourself.

    What would it look like to lean on someone else to hold your hand and heart as you navigate through this world?


    Who do you know that is struggling with keeping it all together and feeling responsible for everyone around them?

    I’ll be hosting another seven-week Mental Fitness Bootcamp starting on December 7th that explores the saboteurs hijacking your feelings which keep you and others from leaning into courageous leadership. Click here to get on the waiting list and to let me know if you are interested. I’ll send you all the details when the program is ready for registration next week!